A Letter Away
I’m writing to tell you that in one week I will marry a man that I really love. If you ask me if he makes me laugh like you used to do, my answer is no, he just doesn’t make me cry.
I remember the time we spent together with a smile on my face and not with sorrow in my soul. It was very hard for me when you just decided that we didn’t work out anymore. After all the promises, all the vows of love you just told me “Sorry Kate, I have to leave the country and you cannot see me again”. You have no idea of what I felt when I saw you leaving our house with all your stuff packaged. For weeks I didn’t eat, I didn’t sleep, I didn’t laugh, I didn’t even cry because my anguish was so strong that my tears just didn’t come out of my eyes. I had the worst year of my life thinking about you, thinking about what might have happened that made you make that decision. I couldn’t talk to you; I didn’t even have an address or a phone number to call to. You left me completely alone, and that is something I will never forgive.
Then Sam appeared in my life, gave me his hand without asking anything in return. We started to go out together, and I gradually started to let you go. When he first kissed me the image that turned out in my head was you. You and me sharing our first kiss in my pool, under the water. Then I focused on Sam and I realized that he was the one who could give me a happy and stable life. We started dating and my love started to be stronger and stronger and I finally fell in love with him. You suddenly turned into a memory that I had to keep with me for the rest of my life.
Today our story broke into my thoughts again when I saw your picture in my old wallet. I took it out and I found myself remembering our silly arguments that always finished with a passionate kiss. I’ve never argued with Sam. He does everything he can to make me happy, even if he doesn’t agree with it. Sometimes I wish he was more like you. I loved when you tapped your foot and would say “No Kate! We won’t do what you want! You’re a spoiled girl!” And then you would hug me when I would do my lovely pout. But still, I love him.
I will get married and I won’t give up on the man that gave me everything he could to make me see the beautiful woman I still was.
I will keep this letter and this photo that I have right here to remember you, your smile and the story we had, but not our love. That one I will throw out the window with a heart ache.
You will always be the love of my life, but even the love of our lives has a time to be lived.
Love, Kate Watson
(- Joana Filipa)
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